Nothing to Report

E and I were so anxious today waiting to hear how court went. The hearing was scheduled for 9am. Monica’s attorney told us that 9:00 hearings are usually done by the time they break for lunch at 1. By the time 1:01 rolled around, we were anxiously and impatiently awaiting news. The most difficult thing about all of this is not knowing what is happening. We just want to know the plan so that we can emotionally, mentally, and physically prepare. So, of course, we were both bouncing off the walls all afternoon waiting for news that never came. Monica’s ongoing worker finally e-mailed us at 5 letting us know that she had just left court and that they still weren’t done deciding the case. In fact, she shared that she still had no idea what would happen with the case. After all that, we still know absolutely nothing at all. UGH!

For now, we have to keep physically planning that Monica will be with us for the foreseeable future, while telling ourselves emotionally that she is leaving tomorrow. With that in mind, we visited a DCF voucher-approved daycare today after work. Monica’s emergency daycare situation will last us through the middle of next week, but we need to get a more permanent spot for anything after that. Luckily, we got good vibes from this provider. Plus she only has 2 other little guys in her care right now, both of whom are within a year of Monica’s age. If Monica does stick around, this feels like it will be a better daycare situation. And I must say it is helpful for us that there won’t be a language barrier between us and the provider.

A quick note about Monica – we have been excited the past few days to see her starting to show some signs of attachment. She has been crying and reaching for us when we drop her off at daycare, and preferring to be with us when others are holding her. While these things make it even harder to think about her leaving and having to form new attachments, they are really good signs of her emotional development. When she came to us, she had no problem going to anyone who approached her, and was really a “love the one you’re with” kind of gal. It’s nice to see this age-appropriate change in her (but again, all the more heart wrenching).

So today, our news is that there is no news. We should know more tomorrow (“should” being the operative term here). For now, we’ll just keep enjoying Monica and her smoosh-able cheeks for as long as she graces us with her presence.


Addendum / after thought – It should be noted that this hearing was the “72 hour hearing” that should have been scheduled for within 72 hours of Monica’s removal. The law gives parents the right to a 72 hour hearing, but apparently they aren’t always scheduled within 72 hours. Just a little glimpse into how the system is broken from all angles.


2 thoughts on “Nothing to Report

  1. Having been another part of your experience since I served as attorney for the Maine Department of Human Services, I can understand and empathize with your frustration. It’s unfortunate that you just have to wait. Caseworker and child’s attorney (guardian, we call them in Maine) should be good about keeping you in the loop. Sometimes you have to realize that no news is good news, in that if the Court ordered a return of the child or a placement with a family member, you would be hearing about it right away!
    Hang in there, you are ‘doing good’!!!
    Love, Aunt Sally

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